Thursday, July 14, 2011

Happy Birthday..."Daddy"

Here's a picture of Marc and his beautiful children, altogether: Caitlyn, Matthew, and his oldest daughter, Keyalah.

Today's the birthday of my children's father. We started off his morning by calling him at work and offering a rousing "HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY" via speaker phone. He was busy, but pleased to hear from the crew. After some time passed, I sent him a text and asked him if he'd like to have lunch with his youngsters today, our treat. He accepted the offer and we met him for his lunch break. I asked him repeatedly to please tell me where he wanted to go. After all, it was his birthday and he didn't have to feel limited to just what I or the children wanted to eat. We could always grab a bite at our favorite spots afterwards. The whole point was to give him something special for his day.
I couldn't get anything more than a "wherever you want to take me". *eye roll*
Finally he decided on Church's Chicken... yep. I felt the same way internally. But I didn't judge! It was his birthday and his taste buds. He didn't have long to eat. Lunch hours suck, don't they? So I was delighted to load up the youngins and meet him there. We ate and small talked, and he listened to the endless chatter of our children. I couldn't help reminiscing as he spoke. I thought about how he was just 29 years old when we first met and now he's 35. I thought about how much he's grown up since those days. As he talked about this and that, I thought about how much we'd been through together, and how after all of that drama, we were still able to sit down at a table together and eat peacefully with our children. I wondered what he was feeling in that moment and what his thoughts could be.
As we were leaving and placing the children in their car seats, he gave me a hug and thanked me for his lunch. I told him I had another gift for him (no biggie, just a replacement bluetooth) and he gave me a second hug.
As we went our separate ways, I gave God thanks for the man who made me a mama. It's been a rocky road but he didn't give up like he felt like doing, so many times. Deep down we both know that I had a lot to do with that but the truth is, God used me to be a blessing to him. I can't sit and be boastful because God can use anyone at any given time to bless our lives. He used Marc to be a blessing to me- twice. Now that our children are getting older, our relationship is changing. We both see the need to work more closely together and parent our children. I see the changes he's been making and he sees mine.
I do wonder if he still loves me, but I'm too afraid to ask. I've bared my heart enough times and had it scolded back into its cage. But you know me...I'm curious. I wonder sometimes.
But just for today, I'll let him have his moment. God's been good to him for 35 years. He kept him safe from harm and blessed him over and over again. He's still here, still in our children's lives and still trying every day to do a better job as a father than his own father did.
Here's to you Boogie. So glad you're the father of my children. They're blessed to have you as an active part of their lives... and so am I.

No comments: